There should be a workshop called ...

"How to write a resume for a job you're barely qualified for."

At this workshop, you learn how to build a resume around your most minimal qualifications, how to kiss ass to the correct people, and how to write a fucking cover letter.

LIFE SKILLS, PEOPLE. LIFE SKILLS.

You want to prepare PhDs to get jobs? Teach them how to get a fucking job. We might be capable of doing the job once we get it, but fuck all if we have any idea how to actually get the job.



Also, "How to find jobs that you're actually qualified for that have nothing to do with labwork."


I'm so brilliant, I should have the job of coming up with relevant, useful workshops. Oh wait, I saw that job posting and I'm not fucking qualified for it.