The "goodness" or lets say "efficacy" of free food can be related to several variables in mathematical terms, including Quantity "Q", Proximity "P" (where a high value indicates that it is very far away), Prior experience during day "D" (where a high value indicates a really, really shitty day), Ease of access "E" (where a high value indicates that the food is very easy to get to), and Taste, "T".
Let us imagine that Efficacy = (QxTxDxE)/P.
This suggests that free food is most effective when there are large quantites, when it tastes good, or when the user is having a terrible day. Free food is most effective when it is not far away (eg. closer).
This explains why I just ate several snack cracker-cheese-turkey bites (and by "mild cheddar," I believe they mean "no flavor cheddar", and really I am just assuming that was turkey based on usual color characteristics of prepackaged turkey slices) that have been sitting out on a counter all day long, but are positioned by the doorway in clear view in a lunchroom that is about 30' from my office.
This also explains why I'll eat week-old pizza in our fridge from a pizza joint that just doesn't re-heat well at all. Proximity score? 8' from my desk. I don't even have to exit my office.
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